Best. Mugshot. Ever?

Really, this Deltona, Florida man’s story isn’t all that interesting, but his mugshot is rather specatular.

Kelsey Smith was arrested with DUI and resisting arrest.  A stun gun had to be used on him, and a ‘spit hood’ put over his head to prevent him from, duh, spitting at his arresting officers.  He also didn’t want his mug shot taken so it took a couple of officers, with gloves, to hold him still for the Glamor Shot you see below.

Yes, It Happened In Florida.

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Stephanie Irene Santana is 20 and pregnant with her second child.  She is also in a lot of trouble.

Santana was arrested early Tuesday morning when she was found asleep in her car, with the engine running, and obviously drunk.  Her 1 year old daughter was in the car, along with beer and a bottle of Xanax.  Santana also failed a field sobriety test.

But witnesses say that Santana earlier had parked her car, left her daughter inside and entered a Houston area tattoo parlor for a piercing.  She was denied because she was drunk and as she left the business witnesses saw the daughter in the car.  Santana was taken to a local area hospital for an evaluation, was charged with driving while intoxicated and endangering a child and the daughter was turned over to Child Protection Services.

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The Coolest or Worst Parents Ever?

Fort Wayne, IN 911 received a call Monday evening that a car leaving a local liquor store had something strapped to the hood that shouldn’t be there.

Four children.

Ages, 4, 5, 6 and 7 – the kids, none of which were injured, were found after the car was pulled over with the children strapped to the hood as the adult couple drove home.  The driver, a male, was arrested for driving while intoxicated and the female was arrested for questioning.  The children were turned over to Child Protective Services.

No explanation was given as to why the kids were on the hood.

via WANE

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Not Drunk, Just Giant Boobs

Maureen Raymond was pulled over in Jensen Beach, FL last weekend when she was spotted speeding and weaving through traffic.

When police interviewed her along the side of the road and insisted that Raymond submit to a sobriety test, because of the obvious odor of alcohol, she offered a warning before walking the line.  Telling police that they, “…needed to understand that she is big-chested” and “she is not going to balance well” Raymond might be the first person to use the “massive breasts” defense in trying to get out of a DUI.

Of course she failed to walk the line even close to straight and obviously, if she couldn’t walk a straight line because of her sizable sweater meat, she was doomed to try the “stand on one leg” test.

This lead to her beginning to take off clothes in an attempt to prove to the police just how big her boobs are.

She was arrested and charged with DUI, and not for having breast too big to drive.


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Worst. Drunk Driver. Ever.

Bradley Garrison, 40, is in a big heap of trouble after being arrested for driving drunk on an Orlando area highway.

After being pulled over he told police that he’d only had “two drinks”, but Garrison gave the truth away in two ways:

  1. The $139.90 bar tab showing purchases of over 20 drinks of Jack Daniels and other drinks from his pants front pocket
  2. The fact he couldn’t complete a field breath alcohol test because he was vomiting too much.

via Star-Banner

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It Happened In Florida

Patricia Siciliano, 41, has been arrested on domestic battery, child abuse, resisting arrest and three counts of batter on a law officer after she and her family attended…

wait for it….


…Blue Oyster Cult concert.

You can guess where this is going.

Yes, a fight started between the woman and her teenage son when he became scare of her drunk driving with him and the father in the truck reaching speeds of 110mph.  After they pulled over the kid took the keys and gave them to the dad.  Now, with the drunk dad driving, Patricia, now drunk and pissed off, began hitting the kid and the father and this continued until the truck ran out of gas.

The kid called the cops, she was arrested and preceded to kick the windows of the patrol car and spit on the officers.

And, it happened in Florida.

via the Orlando Sentinel

The Essential Blue Öyster Cult

Image via Wikipedia

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