And That’s How Irony Works

50 year old Matthew Wong had a terribly evil plan.

He was going to wait in his car for his wife of 25 years, who he was about to lose in a divorce, outside an apartment complex with two bleach bottles full of gasoline.  He was going to pour it on her, light her on fire and end her life in the most horrible of ways.

But that isn’t how it went down.

When his wife Gloria walked out, his ambush failed.  She ran away back through the complex with Matthew chasing her at the same time attempting to pour gas on her.  She was able to enter a neighbor’s apartment to safety.  Matthew then began to cover the apartment entrance with gasoline and then attempted to light it.

But in the course of chasing her he actually had spilled the gas on himself and when he attempted to light the fire, there was a flash explosion that immediately engulfed him in flames.

Other neighbors attempted to douse the flames with extinguishers and blankets, and while Matthew survived he did suffer extensive burns all over his body.

Gloria was unharmed.

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Beware of Falling Cats

An Argentinian woman was seriously hurt last week when a cat hit her on the head.

The 85 year old woman was walking outside her apartment building when a cat was thrown out of a fourth story window and landed on the woman’s head as she was starting to cross the street.  The cat, the victim of a marital spat, was thrown by the husband at his wife.  Just before the wife was hit, she ducked, and the cat went flying out the window behind her.

The woman suffered a fractured skull, and the cat died from the fall and impact.  To make the story even more odd – the victim was the neighbor of the fighting couple.

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